Huge Massive Breaking News In Candy Land! Living Life As It Comes.. No Schedules, No Plans, No Bluep
So Literally I have tears forming globs in my eyes and I have not even written a single sentence yet! Okay, so full on tears at this point. I’ve been holding onto this little secret of mine for a few weeks having only told a few friends and wondering if I could have possibly been mistaken but having just gone through the experience of having my first baby, I kind of new the feelings were back. The nausea, the extra moody ups and downs, the desire to consume 40lbs of the sweetest pineapple on earth which MUST be imported from Costa Rica otherwise, it’s no good! I knew it and today it was confirmed, I’m Freakin’ Pregnant.. Again! Isabella- The Heiress to The Candy Empire is going to turn 1 in 6 weeks and I’m sure by the time Lord Lollipop or Princess Pixie Stick arrives, she’ll be able to drive us around town, fix bottles and change diapers because clearly, I WILL NEED HELP! I was shocked, kinda scared and at one point called myself a total idiot for never planning anything in life.. EVER! I’ve lived this way for so long and now this is the result. When you don’t plan, you have no blue print, no schedule of when things should or shouldn’t happen…. life happens and the truth is, I wouldn’t have it any other way! I don’t know how to be any other way. I’ve always kind of thrown myself into life with an anything goes kind of attitude. If my timing is wrong, if I fail, f- up, if I lose.. oh well, I just give it another go. Like my favorite Japanese Proverb says, ” Fall Seven Times, Stand Up Eight. ” Well, I certainly don’t think I am falling with this news but some who are close to me know that I have a full plate right now that is already over-flowing so how am I going to handle this? I dunno, I don’t think it’s that crazy, we’ll just have to figure it out. That’s all. I have handfuls of friends who are your OCD, Planner, Agenda, Organizer type girls and they just don’t know what to say and since I’m nothing like that and have never officially owned a planner of my own, I think they’re silly. Perhaps it’s because it’s those friends who I text or call at weird hours and say, ” I’m losing my mind, help me” They feel for me and in their minds organization is the spice of life. Anyhow, this is surprising news and I’m happy to know that perhaps my master-plan of creating my very own Kardshians and calling them the Sorkinians and being the puppet master and momager to my very own herd of Brunette beauties who I will collect a 10% commission on isn’t such a farse. I’ve been telling my husband I want a home full of 5 crazy girls for quite sometime and I have all their names picked out.. Isabella, Daniella, Gabriella, Carolina & Trudy. Ok, Trudy I lied about but I thought the name was funny. Anyhow, at this point I’m thinking 2 will be all we can handle for a while so just as I do everything else, I’m going to share this journey with you as it happens. No secrets, no BS, no fluff, I’ll be as transparent as humanly possible because I already lived plenty of years of my life acting like a phony to make other people happy. And, For the 3 people who actually read my blog or (50,000- How Dope is That!) Thanks for being here, I dunno why I cry more when writing to you then I do when I’m actually dealing with people face to face. Here’s to getting Fat again and it’s a damn shame that I had liposuction on my Belly just 12 weeks after I had the first kid. Mom and dad always know best and as my mother told me before I got the procedure done ( *Think hardcore Latina accent ) “Aww my Gaw Yackie, Yew So Crazy Mija, Gwy Yew Gonna Do De Liposuccion, Yew Can Yust Excersize at the Jym on De Byke and estop eating de candies and da breads, breads is so bad!” I love you ma’ but I love da’ candies and I live for a good bread basket! Mom, 1 point for you & negative 3 for me. You really were right about that one. Well, here we grow again gang.. Why the hell, can’t I stop with the crying!!!! 8 months to Go…Pray for me. I’m glad you’re here with me. And for those of you who are highly wigged out by people’s ultrasound pics then just tell yourself, I drew this with an etch-a-sketch and STOP being rude to my baby damn it! One day, this may be you too and you’ll totally understand!
XoXo, Candy Girl
Enjoy this hilarious clip of the Singing Sister’s Skit On SNL? Can you pick out Trudy? C’mon a perfectly stunning family of sisters is kind of annoying, imperfections are appreciated in Candy Land! Well, at least if you’re my kid anyway!